Friday, April 06, 2007

A conversation that I overheard today (at Starbucks):




24-ish boy with awful, greasy hair and filthy, ill-fitting jeans: "I went to see a play at a community theatre last weekend. I find adult community theater, by nature, totally and completely depressing."
Girl of approximately same age wearing too much black eyeshadow and whose "shirt" was, I'm pretty sure, a bra: "Oh, God, I know. Everything about those community theatres makes me want to throw myself headfirst down a fire escape."
The boy: "Those people are always pathetic. Imagine their horrible lives."
The girl: "I know. It reminds me of this guy I work with who I can't stand. He's thirty, balding, hopelessly socially awkward, and also does adult community theater. The other day he was telling me about how he really needs to get serious about his acting career, despite the fact that he is constantly yelled at for being a really crappy worker in the produce department at a grocery store. He recently married a woman who could be his twin."
The boy: "People like that make me want to punch myself in the mouth, especially hard."


I laughed so hard I almost wet my pants.

I stuck around, nursing my coffee so I could hear some more. To my dismay, the pair started talking about organic vegetables, and I didn't find that topic nearly as humorous.

I watched them as they drove away in the boy's ramshackle Honda Civic. I looked for bumper stickers (it's something I do). I've found that any guy that young and opinionated has at least one bumper sticker to let the world know exactly how he feels about what is important to him.

I was delighted to see that the greasy-haired urchin had TWO bumper stickers. I had to knock a toddler out of the way and crook my neck a bit to get a clear view (my neck still hurts; I think the toddler is okay), but alas, I was able to read them perfectly. And, Oh. My. God.






I started laughing again, and this time I laughed so hard a little bit of overpriced coffee came right out of my nose.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I wish I had a bumper sticker that said something about hating organic vegetables! I used to have one that said "Honk if you love Dairy Queen"! I would have laughed at that conversation too! People just always want something to complain about! If they had a hobby (community theatre) maybe they wouldn't have so much time to bitch about other people...that frankly they are probably just jealous of! I'm enjoying your blog! :)
-Em

Sony said...

Fantastic. The beautiful irony of his bumper stickers made me smile.

I wonder if he finds children's community theatre uplifting. Is it only the adults who are depressing?

They should stop by Friday's or Applebee's or Ciao's after a show and have that conversation... I'm sure we theatre folk could find her a nice fire escape. :) LOL. I'm horrible, aren't I?

Only sort of kidding! ;)

KC said...

For years I resisted putting any bumper stickers on my car. I broke down and added one about a year ago. It simply says, "Go see a play." Some people see it as a theatrical statement. Others see it as an incitement to anarchy. Oh well.

Ben said...

Hahaha! Does that girl know me? LOL